Retail Therapy: Are You a Shopaholic?

 

Do you shop for therapy or necessity? In a day and age where there is so much to do, see, buy and become, it isn't surprising that we as North American's purchase tens of thousands of dollars per year in stuff per household. We never actually realize how much we have consumed until it is time to move! 

Why is it that while others have so little we all continue to spend like money is going out of style? Some shop for groceries, which are a necessity. Some shop for Christmas gifts, birthday presents and others just shop to shop. That's right, shopping as a form of entertainment to pass the time. Find out if you are a good shopper or if you are shopping for therapeutic reasons that you may have never even considered before. Shopping is fun, just don't make it all that you do for fun.

Signs that You Might be Shopping for Therapy

1. You shop after you get really disappointed, angry or need a breather. 

There is nothing wrong with going for a nice little window shopping experience now and then. There is a problem when you use it as a way to escape a current situation or reality. Many women in particular shop after a boyfriend has dumped them or they didn't get the promotion they were expecting. Some do it in the form of changing their image such as their appearance (clothes, hair, shoes, accessories) and others just simply buy whatever they see. These items in some way make them feel like they have replaced something that is missing in their life and heart. 

Like food to some people, shopping can act as a comfort. Often afterwards most realize that they never even use or wear these items that hang in their closets with tags. Men are guilty of this too, not just women, and their purchases can be just as expensive, if not more! The midlife crisis comes to mind as we think of flashy sportscars and an older gentleman in one, but younger guys are no different often times. While women generally go for shoes, handbags, clothing and jewelry, men generally go for gadgets, technology, cars and motorcycles. When the initial thrill of the new purchase is over, many are left with a mountain of debt.

2.Shopping for Entertainment.

It's Saturday and you're bored, you call up a friend and go shopping for the afternoon which gets followed up with a dinner and drinks. Does this sound familiar? You intended to just window shop but found that cute pair of heels on sale, a great belt and wandered the mall with a Starbucks' in hand. Then somehow after the shopping is over you are hungry and there isn't anything appealing at home. So, what's a girl to do? Eat out of course, and why not have a special drink to conclude another successful day of good shopping-NOT! 

You need to get a grip and find other forms of entertainment. This is not only costly, but  unhealthy. Why not get in a workout or take a cooking class, do some spring cleaning or spend some time volunteering or honing that new skill you promised to follow through with. Like other forms of entertainment, it allows most to take their mind off any problems and realities that exist. I'm not suggesting that shopping is a sin, nor is getting together as girls do, to have a nice day together. The problem in North America is that this is more often than not the norm, the weekend ritual. I think we are far more educated an interesting than to fill our time with needless, mindless shopping experiences again and again.

3.Searching for a Purpose. Some people truly have never sat down and determined what they want out of life, what their goals are and how to achieve them. Furthermore many are working at a job that does not fulfill them or allow them to be ignited with passion. There is then a longing for purpose in life. Many women are stay-at-home moms and are happy to be, but wonder if there is also another purpose for their life. So begins the next therapy session, shopping for purpose in life. Let's face it, when we clip coupons and look for great deals in the weekly flyers we feel empowered. We often then get it in our mind that we are going to get some great deals and conquer the stores. We now have a purpose, looking for the items on sale! It gives us something to do with our time ,and we experience a sense of reward when we come home with our bargains.Nothing is wrong with coupon clipping, saving money for your family and picking up necessities. When you look for reasons to incorporate more shopping into your day, it is a problem. Now might be a good time to re-evaluate what you want out of life and find a less-costly means of accomplishing that.

Just remember every time you shop, your credit card balance and interest increases, your bank account decreases and you get nothing but a false sense of purpose and happiness. When you pick up each item ask yourself if you really need it or if you simply want it? Next, ask yourself what this item solves and if you can live without it. Most of the items we purchase because they seem like a great deal, or they're the hot new product advertised on TV (think infomercials),  but we never really needed the items to begin with. Think about all the items you bought and have never really used. If you got dumped, shopping might make you feel better for an hour after making your purchases but after that you are still on your own to perhaps think about your current reality.

My goal is to help people in any way that I can. I have certainly been guilty of the first two at some point in time and want to see women in particular excel in life and drop all of the unnecessary things that can often rob us of our dreams, weigh us down and burden us with debt.

Does this describe anyone you know? 

Reader Request: E-mail Etiquette

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Today's reader request is an anonymous one. It comes from a personal acquaintance who asked me not to share her name. It was sparked by a recent e-mail that she had received from an upset family member. Based on the way the e-mail was written and the fact that so many of us communicate via e-mail vs. the telephone, she asked me if I would write a post on e-mail etiquette.

We all spend a lot of time e-mailing and for many it has become the preferred method of communication. E-mail saves time and often avoids needless chatter in order to be more productive. However, it also is the cause of a lot of grief for many people as e-mail messages can be misconstrued, improperly conveyed or downright rude.

Here are a 12 rules to abide by when e-mailing your colleagues, clients,  friends and family:

E-MAIL ETIQUETTE

1. Never E-mail Using All CAPS- This is read as 'yelling' and is considered very rude.  Treat an e-mail in the same way you would an actual letter. I thought everyone knew this one but I still get emails like this and it's usually just laziness, the person sending it couldn't be bothered to take the caps lock off.

2. Avoid Spamming- Don't spam people that don't know you very well with your "forward messages", be very selective about who you send these to if anyone at all.  What may be important and interesting to you may be incredibly annoying to someone else.

3. Don't 'Reply-all'- If you find yourself receiving an email and you would like to reply; do not reply to a group by hitting the 'reply all' button, rather reply to the individual sender only. This will save embarrassment on both ends and will not annoy all the other recipients or clog up their inbox. What starts off as one e-mail about a particular topic can easily turn into 20 if you get enough people fired up. This often happens with political or highly opinionated e-mails.

4. Say Their Name- When e-mailing anyone, it is considered disrespectful to begin an email without addressing the person you are writing to. If you are replying to a note, that is more acceptable, but addressing the person first by their name is proper. However that first initiated email must be addressed to whom you are sending it. It cannot begin with 'hi', 'hey' or your e-mail content right off the bat. Think of it as a phone call or conversation, you would say hello first before jumping to what you want to tell or ask the other person.

5. Use a Title- Always put a subject in the "subject" line so that the recipients can determine which e-mails to read first. Believe it or not, your e-mail may not be at the top of their 'importance' list. Other pressing e-mail may need to be attended to first so it's best to list it as 'low priority' and include a brief subject such as 'hi' or 'let's catch up!'. Avoid listing an e-mail as high priority unless it is in fact of the utmost importance to the recipient (not you).

6. Use Proper Spelling and Grammar!  With spell check and online dictionaries available today, there is absolutely no excuse for incorrect spelling and poor grammar. It just looks really unprofessional and sloppy regardless of who you are sending it to.

7. Do NOT Forward Chain letters, Junk mail or Warnings-This is annoying to anyone receiving it and a huge time waster! Many of these 'forwarded' emails could potentially contain viruses also, which I can assure your friends, family and colleagues will not appreciate.

8. Privacy is Appreciated- Use the 'Bcc' blind carbon copy feature to send a message to a large group of people who don't necessarily know each other. It protects their email information from others that may not know them and they'll appreciate your discretion too.

9. Use Proper Sentence Structure- Don't lump every sentence into one large paragraph, this is very difficult to read. Treat it as you would any other letter you would write. Make it easy to read. I have a friend who is notorious e-mailing me one really large paragraph which takes more time to read and reply to when wanting to comment or answer questions that were posed.

10. Signing Off- Use a signature that includes your contact information. This is most important with colleagues and or clients so they can easily get in touch with you. I know many people that use this format in their personal e-mail too and I find it helpful. Often they include their address or telephone number and it keeps me from having to look it up, when I need it.

11. Don't Be Confrontational- An e-mail should NEVER be the chosen format of communication when your emotions are running high and you are angry or frustrated with someone. You're liable to write something that you'll regret and can't take back, this is also the fastest way to start a fight.

What's worse is your poorly chosen words and angry 'rant' might then be forwarded to others to read. Regardless of the situation or how badly someone has hurt you, it is best to take some time to cool off, gather your thoughts, write them down and plan out how you'd like to communicate your message in the form of a phone call or face-to-face meeting. It's also never a good time to leave a voicemail message.

The people in your life deserve more than an e-mail and it is considered to be quite rude to send such e-mails to vent and get your point across.

12. Double Check-Take a moment to double check the recipients in your e-mail. Many people I know have sent out an e-mail to the wrong person. This is easy to do if you're typing in the first few letters of the person's name or email. Quite often another name will pop up. I've had this happen twice and both were completely harmless, one actually made it to my hair stylist in error. lol. You never know what information you may providing to the wrong people. Just be careful.

It goes without saying that anything that is confidential, private information should never be shared via e-mail. Personal bank account information, social security numbers and medical history should be avoided by e-mail. This way you can save yourself a lot of hassle and potentially even identity theft.

Want more etiquette posts? Here are a few more:

Cell Phone Etiquette

Restaurant Tipping Etiquette

Etiquette for Hosting House Guests

Re-gifting Etiquette

Have you had any personal experiences with those that are unaware of e-mail etiquette? Share with us, you can always leave an anonymous response.

Foods That Make You Feel FULL

With so many women making fresh commitments to their health for 2010 in both healthy eating and exercise, I thought I'd share some snacks that will help you feel full between meals. As a former personal trainer, I've tested these out and know that they contain solid nutrients, protein, proper carbohydrates and essential fats.


Maybe it's the growling in your stomach or a 3pm afternoon craving that has you searching for a snack between meals, whatever the case, you'll want to focus on eating foods that make you feel full but are healthy too.Too many people eat sugar and carbohydrates all day and wonder why they constantly feel hungry. Your body needs a nice even balance of essential fats, protein and carbohydrates. If you overindulge in one and forget about the others, your body will let you know!

The first step is to make sure you are eating properly during mealtimes. If you are eating a lot of grains like white pasta and rice- or worse, mostly sugar like candy bars, chips and soda, but no form of protein, you will constantly feel the need to eat, which brings about the need for multiple snacks. The best thing to do is ensure that at each meal you are eating protein, carbs and fat. An example might be toast with peanut butter and a piece of fruit like a bananas or a small bowl of berries. The fat and protein are contained in the peanut butter but the toast and banana will give you some sugars for energy too. Lunch might consist of salmon over a salad with several veggies and a light dressing. Dinner could be a chicken breast with asparagus drizzled with a bit of olive oil and some wholegrain rice.

Once you've balanced out your meals (and likely made them healthier at the same time) then you'll need to know what to eat during snack times. It has been proven several times over that eating 5-6 smaller meals are far more effective at both keeping you feeling full longer and losing weight as well as speeding up your metabolism, than eating only 2-3 larger meals all day long. Plan to eat smaller meals and incorporate the following as snacks in between major meals and once after dinner. Chances are if you eat a really early dinner, say before 6pm, and you stay up late, you'll be very hungry by about 8pm. Try some of the following ideas as substitutes for your regular choices.

12 Healthy, Balanced, Filling Snacks

1. Slice up a whole apple (add some cinnamon if you like) and spread with low-fat plain cream cheese or peanut butter or you can add a couple thin cheddar cheese slices. The protein and fat in the cheese coupled with the fiber in the apple will help keep you feel full. You know what the say-an apple a day...

2. A handful (about 15 pieces) of nuts such as almonds, walnuts or pecans are best.

3. Bananas are perfect, they contain both potassium and magnesium which play vitally important roles in: nerve transmission; protein and carbohydrate metabolism; muscle contraction; and in maintaining cellular integrity and water balance.

4. Whole Wheat crackers with low fat cheese or cream cheese spread

5. Whole Wheat pita bread wedges with hummus

6. Homemade granola with shredded coconut, dried cranberries, raisins, and an assortment of nuts. (You'll need only a small handful only or a 1/4 cup to measure)

7. A yogurt cup of whole yogurt like plain low-fat Greek yogurt (not sugar free which is full of toxic aspartame) which is very high in protein, with some fresh berries mixed in such as strawberries, raspberries or blueberries.

8. An egg is a great snack. You can make a batch of hardboiled eggs ahead of time and eat one with a little pepper, ketchup or salsa and add some crackers or a small piece of toast.

9. A protein smoothie is one of the most fun snacks, you'll need a blender or hand blender to mix the ingredients. Add some frozen fruit, a bit of yogurt, some soy, almond or cow's milk and you can also add a scoop of whey, soy or vegetarian protein powder to ensure you'll get enough protein.

10. Cottage cheese can be added to both sweet and savory foods. Eat ½ cup inside half of a cantaloupe or add some fresh berries instead. If you like savory, add some tuna.

11. Veggie sticks and a healthy dip like tuna mixed with ½ cup of cream cheese, you can add some minced onion and chopped parsley to taste. Chili sauce can be added and blended in the food processor and stored for an easy-to-grab snack.

12. Wasa bread or whole wheat crackers with thin slices of Swiss and a bit of ham for a ham and cheese fix.

Remember to eat the proper portion sizes, crackers and cheese are a yummy snack, so it would be easy to get carried away to the point of it being a dinner size portion. You can solve this by ensuring that all of your snacks are around the 200-250 calorie range. Just measure it out according to the serving size and avoid adding extra fats, salt, artificial sweeteners or sugar.

I hope this has inspired you to try some new snacks that are not only healthier for you but will truly fill the hunger gap between meals. I encourage you to look online for new and interesting snacks that can easily be made ahead of time and brought in reusable containers with you to work or on the road, which is when we're all most susceptible to choosing the wrong snacks. Also, by keeping hydrated you'll feel full and it will help increase your metabolism. You can add in the healthy amount of water in cups (which is your weight in pounds divided by 14).


One of my newest favorite snacks is from Celebrity Personal Trainer Harley Pasternak, and can be found HERE.

If you have a favorite healthy snack, leave a comment and share it with everyone.


Happy Snacking!

Get Organized Once and For All!

Image Source

Since we are still in the first week of the New Year, I thought I'd share some organizing tips to make your home a more wonderful place to live. This is by far one of the biggest goals I've heard people talk about so far this week. Organizing your home can feel like a daunting task but it doesn't have to be.

I originally began my design business as a Professional Organizer as I enjoy helping people set up systems so they can be more productive, relaxed and enjoy their home. Here are some tips from an article that I wrote in that are sure to get you headed towards a clutter-free home.

ORGANIZE YOUR HOME WITH 7 SIMPLE SECRETS

Say NO to Clutter!

When was the last time you opened the door to that forbidden room, you know the one that you keep all of your items that you are unsure where else to put? Maybe it's the multi-purpose room that serves as your closet, guest room, office and dumping ground? You can be free and rid your home of clutter once and for all. There are lots of people who feel hopeless in their piles of laundry, papers, and heaps of unused items. Those that have an organized space have simply chosen to live clutter-free, and are not any smarter or luckier than you. They know a few simple secrets that allow their home to be organized and therefore stress free. I want to help you take charge and gain control of your home and life! Let's get started...

1. Out with the OLD, in with the NEW!

To minimize what goes into your house in the first place, remember this simple rule: If you bring a new item in, then one has got to go! For example when I buy new clothes I look at what I have before I go shopping. This way I don't wind up with 4 white v-neck t-shirts. When I come home from my shopping trip with a pair of jeans, 2 blazers and a sweater, I look at what will now go out the door also. That may be the old items I'm replacing or simply just other clothing items, otherwise my closet would become a jam-packed disaster quickly. The same is true for furniture (unless you're filling a new home or simply don't have ANY furniture), as well as other household items like candlestick holders, napkins etc...

2. Keep Out!

One thing I've coach my clients on is keeping a clutter-free home by refusing to bring some items inside the house to begin with. Junk mail, flyers, trash from the car, and unwanted items are just a few that come to mind. In order to avoid these, I sift through my mail and flyers near the garage where the recycling and trash bins are. Then I can immediately get rid of what we don't need. I do the same with any trash in our car. If we pickup some bottled water, or take home bulletins from church, the minute we get out of the car next, be it at a gas station or at home, the garbage goes!

You can simply say no to friends, family or neighbors that want to burden you with junk. If you really don't want the item they give you but they insist you have it, toss it as soon as you get inside or find someone else to give it to that will like it, you can even re-gift it. This may sound cruel but so is the pushiness of some people in our life who have us take what we truly don't want. Email works the same. As soon as I open my email the first thing that I do is highlight all the junk and hit delete. Once trash is out of the way I can focus on the important messages. Also, it frees me up from heaps of junk messages that use up my storage space. Think about what items you could eliminate like this everyday.

3. Don't Keep Things You Don't Like

This probably sounds obvious, but you would be surprised at the amount of clients I have worked with that actually keep items they think are ugly or just don't fit any room in their home! Don't hold onto old furniture or keepsakes that have been handed down to you just because a loved one gave them to you. Simply give the items to someone that you know who will actually like and want them. If that is not an option then donate them or sell them on ebay and make some money while you are at it! It is good to be proactive in this area also.

I myself almost got stuck with a heap of antique furniture while moving down south  as my grandmother was getting ready to move to a retirement home at the same time. I had to just say "I would love to, but I simply can't. This eliminated a lot of lifting, transporting and storing of unwanted goods just to appease her. I much preferred that she sell it to an antique dealer and keep the money for herself.

4. Don't Become a Storage Unit for Friends

While we're on the subject of "storing" items, it is never a good idea to store items for friends, relatives or neighbors. They often have the best intention to come back and pick them up but they sometimes don't. This leaves you stuck with someone else's unwanted stuff. If you are currently in this situation, call up these individuals and tell them you are doing an early 'spring cleaning' and simply cannot hold onto their belongings anymore. You can instruct  them to come over and get them within a few days, and if they don't, you can let them know that you'll donate them to Salvation Army on their behalf if they would prefer. This is not being rude, after all they left THEIR stuff at YOUR house! This is simply reclaiming your home, life and letting you get free from clutter.

5. Have a Measurable De-cluttering Goal

It is important to have goals set for anything you wish to achieve in life. Organizing and getting rid of clutter in your home are no different. I know that the piles can seem daunting but when you have a set goal you will not only feel in control, but you will have direction and a sense of accomplishment when you are finished. For example if you are looking to clean up your basement or even a closet, have a goal that you want 25% of the items to be gone. Those items need to leave the house for trash or donation unless it is a piece of furniture, or valuable item. If they don't then all you have done is allocated clutter to other areas of your home. Maybe your goal is to get rid of 40 pieces of clothing/shoes. Whether in increments or as an entirety, create a goal as to what you want the end result to look like.

6. Start Small

Most of my clients have called me to help them because the feeling of being overwhelmed by clutter was too much for them, moreso because they had no idea where or how to start. This need not be complicated nor make you overly exhausted. If a full room is too much for one day, spend one hour per day or a particular part of a room such as all of the dresser drawers as day 1, and what is under the bed as part 2 etc. Starting small allows you to feel a sense of relief, but often times you'll find that once you get on a roll, you won't want to stop until the room is done. You'll surprise yourself! Put on some of your favorite music and get started!

7. My step-by-step Secrets to Organize ANY Room

I will let you in on my secrets of organizing because anybody can do this, you need not be a rocket scientist! Firstly, pick one room at a time like the spare/guest bedroom. Make 4 piles in that room. One pile is for trash, another pile is for items you don't want but wish to donate, and the third for items that truly belong elsewhere in the house like oven mitts or CD's, and the forth is for items you wish to sell online or at a garage sale. If you were planning a garage sale anyway you can add the items for donation to this. Then get some garbage bags and take the trash to the curb. This will not only make you feel less overwhelmed but give you more space to work and walk in.

From there you can decide if you want to display certain items, or if they are to be filed or stored away neatly. All of these items can be labeled with a marker and masking tape or label maker (this is a great investment). Then take all of the items that did not belong to their appropriate space and distribute them accordingly. This need not be complicated, just pace yourself and take your time during each step. Most importantly, you need to be brutally honest about what you use and what you don't. You've probably heard this before, but it's so true, if you haven't worn it in a year or you haven't used it in the past 6 months (other than seasonal decor), you should probably get rid of it because you WON'T use it!

Have FUN! I know that the time you put into your home will give you such an amazing sense of accomplishment. It will brighten your spirit and give you the desire to not only tackle other areas of your home, but keep them that way!

What areas of your home have you recently tackled? How did you feel afterwards?

Top Posts of 2009

Even though my focus on 2010 is in full swing, I thought it would be fun to share with you and reflect a little on what YOU all viewed the most last year here at Classy and Fabulous.

Our Top 5 Posts (by pageview):


1. Wow for Walmart Decor (Under $100)

2. Cupcake Cuteness: Baking Ideas and Fun Finds

3. Monogram Monday

4. Fall Fashion Trends 2009

5. How to Dress Classy on a Budget

Top 10 Countries that Read This Blog

1. United States
2. Canada
3. United Kingdom
4. Australia
5. Russia
6. India
7. Philippines
8. Italy
9. Malaysia
10. Singapore

We currently have readers in 85 countries. I'm so glad you all found me and I am thrilled to have so many new 'friends' in the blogosphere!

What was your favorite post last year? Also, feel free to leave a link to the most viewed post on YOUR blog last year so we can all check it out! :)

The Art of Being a Good Listener

Have you ever thought about why we were given two ears but only one mouth? I truly believe that we were meant to listen more than we speak. I am always in awe when I meet people who are truly good listeners. They seem to be few and far between these days but it is a skill that we can all develop if we choose to focus and pay more attention to how we act and react.

This past New Year's Eve, my hubby and I were invited to two parties and the first stop was the home of one of our dear couple friends'. There were many strangers among the group with whom we conversed with but I also got to see a woman that I hadn't seen in several months. I don't know her extremely well but we've been a part of the same social events and have e-mailed each other recently about getting together.

She walked over and started chatting with myself and my hubby (whom she'd met once before). We started catching up on our holiday events and she had started asking me some specific questions about what was new in my life in certain areas. Once I began answering her, she became distracted and stopped listening. My responses were not long and were new bits of information to her. Somehow though, she kept pausing and stepping out of our conversation to go grab something for her new boyfriend (who accompanied her to the party and whom I had met for the first time), and to grab a glass of water as she ate something spicy, etc. I can't remember every single circumstance but there were a LOT of interruptions coming from someone who seemed so interested and had asked me about what I was sharing with her. It appeared as though a lot of her distractions involved making a good impression on her new boyfriend by attending to his every need.

I made it a point to pay closer attention when I asked her questions and to be an even better listener because what had just happened to me was not comfortable and was quite frustrating to say the least. If you're going to ask someone a question, listen for the answer, don't just appear interested to attempt to be social. She did however, inspire today's post.

One the flip side, I have known so many great listeners, one in particular always comes to mind because he has such a way of making you feel like you're the only person in the room and that nothing outside of your conversation at that time matters. I was so drawn to this quality in fact, that he is someone that I wound up dating for several years, many years before meeting my husband. Listening to others to understand what they are going through or what is on their heart makes someone feel special. It makes someone feel appreciated, heard and less alone, which many people in this world feel.

Becoming a better listener improves who you are as a person. When you are 'present' in the moment, you are not already thinking of your next response to someone's comment, or seeking out a way that you can relate to them by rifling through your mental file of your past. Many people treat conversations as a competition and are ready to fire out the next joke, comment or fact. However, being present is so important to our overall well-being and it allows us to retain more information and better assimilate information for future reference. We know by now that multi-tasking doesn't really exist. We need to be focused on one thing at a time. Have you ever talked to someone on the phone who was driving, putting away the dishes at home or worse-surfing the net while talking to you? We can always tell that they are not fully paying attention, so I'm not sure how they think they're fooling anyone.

I am amazed at how some of my friends (who are good listeners) can recall certain specific information about me or something I had mentioned one time, long ago offhand. Those are the friends that I consider to be my true friends, the ones that put themselves aside for a few minutes and really listen. Don't we all want to be a better friend, partner, wife, mother? Here are some tips below that will encourage you to listen with both ears.

Becoming a Better Listener

1. Maintain Eye Contact- This lets the speaker know that you are listening. You can incorporate acknowledgements by nodding your head too which shows that you are paying attention. There's nothing worse than talking to someone who is looking around the room, starting down to check their phone and generally appearing disinterested. Eye contact is key.

2. Don't Interrupt- As much as you want to jump in with a similar experience or mention something you heard on the news that relates, resist the urge. Interruptions can cause the person speaking to lose their train of thought. Besides, cutting people off and constantly interjecting is just plain rude. It tells the person speaking that what you have to say is more important than what they have to say.

3. Stop Fidgeting- Many people fiddle with their clothes, twirl their hair or slouch in their chair which shows boredom and disinterest  (whether they realize they're doing it or not) and can actually distract the person who is speaking, whether it is a formal or casual setting. Sometimes, what someone says may not be of interest to you, especially in a long lecture but just press through and know that it will be over soon. Try to sit up straight, avoid fidgeting and instead focus on the person speaking. Remember that what you have to say might not always be interesting to everyone around you, so be gracious.

4. Repeat Their Words- To show the person speaking that you are listening, repeat what they said or comment and say something short like, 'Wow, I had no idea that Bali, Indonesia had so many beautiful places to surf'. Be sure to keep it short though so you don't distract them or wind up taking over the conversation which can be easy to do.

5. Avoid Distractions- Whether you are meeting someone for business, joining some friends for coffee or spending time together with your spouse, the most important thing to do is eliminate distractions before they arise. If you go out to dinner to catch up, make sure your cell phone is off and that your kids are left with the sitter. Set yourself up to be a better listener that will not be distracted by other people, noises, phone calls, the TV, computer and the like.

None of us are without flaws and I can certainly attest to being a poor listener at times, especially when I have a lot on my 'to do' list. Everyday I strive to become a better one though, especially in my own home. It's easy to take someone close to you like a spouse for granted, especially when you may have heard the same story many times before and feel like you don't need to hear it one more time.

Is there anyone in your life whom you admire because they are such great listeners? Maybe you experience people who constantly interrupt you? Does their behavior inspire you to become a better listener?


Thanks for Reading!

XO



*image: (1)

Quotes by Oprah

Today's post is short and sweet, I'm sharing some of my favorite quotes from a classy woman that ALL of you know and many of you love-Oprah! I hope these 7 quotes will cause you to think about your own life and go after your dreams this year!

'Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.'

'My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.'

'The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams!'

'I believe the choice to be excellent begins with aligning your thoughts and words with the intention to require more from yourself.'

'There's no easy way out. If there were, I would have bought it. And believe me, it would be one of my favorite things!' (on exercise/losing weight)

'Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.'

'The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on success but significance - and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning.'

~All quotes listed above by Oprah Winfrey.

What is your favorite quote? It doesn't have to be one from Miss. Winfrey, but I'd love to hear which ones you refer to when you need some inspiration!